Scaling Back (Eating) Operations

One of the first things people learn about me is that I eat a lot. No really, I can consume enough to feed a small village within a day. It is both unhealthy and hilarious.

As of late, due to the increasingly sedentary lifestyle I have chosen to lead, my body has been taking a hit. Love handles, a little belly, you name it. In a (losing) effort to bring my weight back into my average range, I have begun to scale back on the amount I eat.

Comparison (Universally applicable, I hope)

Before = two 12oz steaks, two scoops of mashed potatoes, and bread. No. Problem.
Now = one 10oz steak, one scoop of mashed potatoes, and some bread. Resist urge to eat more. Cause I will.

I have been doing this since about November, and only recently has my body begun to appreciate my efforts. It has stopped barking orders during dinner time, orders that sound like a drill sergeant during boot camp. Only it was a boot camp to get fat.

“Eat the rest of that plate, son, or you will be the laughing stock of this fat camp.”

No, good sir, I refuse.

Thankfully, my body has adjusted to eating a regular person’s portion. Maybe still larger than most would consider “regular,” but hey, it’s progress.

Next step: actually stick to a regular exercise plan, more than the pushups and sit-ups that I do in the morning. Easily doable.

Next-er step: use my new found strength (from exercising) to fight crime. Maybe plausible.